I had the chance the other night on the full eclipse day to look through a very large telescope into the sky. I was already overwhelmed with what I had just witnessed with seeing the moon travel in front of the sun. I was wearing gear that permitted me to look straight at it. I will just say that there are times in my life that I totally disconnect with feeling human. When the wonder and shock of things is so overwhelming that it puts my mind in a state of euphoria, spiritually. As I was looking at the moon make its way in front of the sun and listening to great gig in the sky by pink floyd, I experienced that state of mind again. When nothing in the world matters besides that moment. Nothing. All of the aches I was feeling, turmoil, sadness, fear, worry, etc. It was all gone for a small moment while watching this happen. There is so much more to life than we understand. I wanted to burst out of my seat like a giant spring and fly right onto the moon for a front row seat. (without getting fried to a crisp of course because this is a fantasy, not reality) I wanted to go with it. I wanted to be taken out of the pain and drama of life and just go for a ride, maybe wave down on all of the lucky souls who actually give a damn about amazing events such as this.

I want nothing more than to see space and wander around galaxies to see what its all about. There is nothing more exciting to me than being able to see planets, stars, moons, galaxies, etc. Well, actually. . . maybe swimming in a river naked after drinking my share of whisky, or making love to my soul mate, or giving birth to a child. .

So after the eclipse, my friend set the telescope up and I went over to see what was waiting for me inside. I am already as blind as a bat so I was nervous I wouldn't see it. Then it happened. My eyes focused and there, in all of her glory and beauty and sheer mystery was Saturn. If you are opened spiritually I believe certain things happen inside of you when you see things like this. For me, it was a feeling of wonder, mystery, frozen shock, curiosity and a ton of eeriness. It was small and very bright but the rings were perfectly visible. I felt like an ant.

Then I noticed a beautiful bright star and was fixated on that and asked my friend what that was...It looked familiar. He said "Vega". My heart sank and I knew it. Its like the little bastard mustached ring leader of my life circus came out once again with his stupid little top hat on and yelled in my head "time to start the show you emotional wreck of a human!" I felt the emotions poor in thinking of my daughter I placed for adoption. I named her Aurora Vega. That name is only real on her birth certificate and in the sky for me to see every night.